Touching Angels

All God's angels come to us disguised.
~James Russell Lowell~

Have you ever wondered if angels really exist?  I'm here to tell you, they do - but not all of them have wings or halos.  Let me tell you my story - It's as real to me today as it was way back then.  I'll have to tell you about the events leading up to my encounter so you can hopefully understand my state of mind.  It's probably long so I apologize for that now.

It was May, 2000.  I was still working then (for the Department of Elections) and my boss sent me to Fairfax, VA to sit on a discussion panel about absentee voting.  The date coincided with National Police Week so I told my friend - who, until this point, I'd only talked to online - that I'd take the train in for one of the ceremonies and we could finally meet in person.  BEST thing I ever did! (Another story for another time)

During police week, there are three events that never change - on the 13th, there's a candlelight vigil to remember and honor police officers who gave their lives in the line of duty.  On the 14th, there's a parade of Emerald Societies and Pipe Bands (that's bagpipes for those who don't know) followed by another emotional ceremony to honor the sacrifices made by Irish law enforcement officers.  Then, on the 15th, there's a ceremony to commemorate National Peace Officer's Day which is held on the grounds of the US Capitol and at which the keynote speaker is often the President of the US.  My friend and I can usually tell when someone is attending Police Week for the first time because of the look on their face - we call it 'shell shock'.

In 2000, the Candlelight Vigil was rained out and was combined with the Emerald Society ceremony on the 14th.  The reason I mention this - and think it's important - is because it was like a double whammy of shell shock for me.  I remember feeling numb but still crying.  I don't think I realized how much I was affected by the flood of emotion that I was sure I didn't feel until days later.

After the evening's events were over and I had spent some time getting to know my friend better, we said our good nights and I went back to my hotel.  After the discussion panel the next day and a meeting in Richmond the following day, I finally made it home where I decided to visit an online forum for the spouses of police officers that I was a member of.  My intent was to write about my first police week experience.  Instead, I was smacked in the face with a post about a young officer in Doraville Georgia who was killed in the line of duty.

His name was Hugo Arango.  I'll spare you all the details of what I read.  Suffice it to say that he was shot several times.  The one part that I kept reading over and over again was that, after he was shot and lying dead on the ground, his murderer walked up to his lifeless body, placed his gun directly on Det. Arango's badge and fired another shot.  He made his point - he killed a cop.

About that time, my husband came downstairs.  He had to work the midnight shift and as he stepped off the last step and turned to face me, the light shined on his badge.  I showed him the story about Det Arango and his only comment was "oh well - occupational hazard".  Now I understand that's not how he felt but how he dealt with it in front of me, but still, it added to the emotions that were already threatening to burst from my chest.

My husband left for work and I sat home, alone, crying.  I felt helpless and a whole string of other things that I still can't describe today.

The next day, I got up and tried to get myself together to go to work.  I was an even bigger basket case of tears and emotions - and I couldn't stop thinking about my grandfather.  I had an overwhelming need to be with him.  Why he was on my mind at this time was beyond me - until I called work and told them I just could NOT make it.  I looked at the calendar.  It was May 18, 2000.  The twentieth anniversary of his death.

After I called work, I got dressed and drove to the cemetery.  I walked up to my grandparent's graves and just stood there.  I had no flowers, no purpose.  I felt lost but knew that I just needed to be there.  I don't remember, but I'm pretty sure I was crying.

Suddenly, someone walked up to me and said "I don't mean to intrude but you look like you need a hug".  I looked at a young woman who I hadn't seen anywhere around when I drove up.  I still don't know where she came from.  I told her that yes, I did need a hug.  Why I said that, I have no clue - it certainly wasn't a conscious decision.  She put her arms around me and hugged me gently.  I was immediately filled with warmth and a sense of peace.  Have you ever felt something that affected you so profoundly that you still feel it years later?  That's how that sense of peace affected me.

We spoke for a few minutes and then she handed me a card and told me "My name is Tiffany.  I work here.  If you ever need anything, please call me."  I thanked her and put her card in my pocket.  I honestly don't remember her leaving - or me, either, for that matter.  But when I got home, I reached in my pocket to put her card away and, yeah, you guessed it - there was no card.

About a year later, I  had an appointment with a new doctor and her office happened to be right next to the cemetery.  After my visit, I decided that, since I was right there, I would stop by and pay my respects to my grandparents.  When I pulled up to their grave site, I could tell there was a funeral about to take place on the other side of the little road.  A man from the cemetery was standing there and I asked if I'd be in the way.  He said no, the hearse was about 15 minutes out.

I spent a couple minutes with my grandparents and went back to my car.  Before I got in, I asked the man if they had anyone working there named Tiffany.  He said no, they'd never had anyone working there with that name since he'd been there.  I asked how long he'd been there and he said "ten years".  That was just confirmation of what I already knew.  I had been touched by an Angel.