Speak It, Believe It

You may not seem able to change some outer circumstances but you can start by changing your inner experience of life and yourself.
~Joy Page~

Many years ago when I was newly employed at what would be my last job (never thought I'd work there long enough to retire!), I had a brief encounter with a stranger in an elevator.  It was actually pretty generic and quite simple but it's an encounter I've never forgotten and continues to have an effect on my life even today.


I don't remember if we got on the elevator at the same time or if one of us "picked up" the other on the trip, but I do recall the seconds-long conversation:  He: "Good morning!  How are you?" Me: "Good morning!  I'm great, how are you?"  He:  "I'm great too."  We both chuckled a little and then he said "you know, we might as well say we're great even if we're not.  If our brain hears it enough, our bodies will start to believe it."   The doors opened, we said our "have a good days" and just like that, the stranger was out of my life for good.  I doubt I'd recognize him on the street today but I'll never forget his words.  That's the day that I decided I would always try to have a positive attitude.


My desire for a positive attitude was reinforced as I began to notice the way others interacted with those around them.  I found myself preferring not to be around those who were always complaining or found only the bad in every situation.  You know the kind of people I'm talking about - they seem to have a problem for every solution.  I would find reasons not to be around those people more and more.  I noticed how draining it was to be in the presence of those "Debbie Downers" for too long and promised myself that I would never be one of them.  I wish they could all learn what I learned.


As I became more positive in my outer presence, something was happening inside me.  I began to feel calmer, more confident and smiled more.  I experienced more moments of being happy and satisfied.  My posture improved - which I think automatically makes you feel somewhat empowered (try standing up straight and tall and notice the difference).  Even my health seemed to be better.  Other than the occasional cold, I rarely get sick and when I do, it's usually pretty mild.


Just as hearing yourself say positive things about you, saying negative things has the same effect.   In my opinion, constantly finding the bad and always complaining are self-abuse.  If a parent did that to a child, it would be verbal and emotional abuse.  So why do it to yourself?


No one skirts through life without having some bad things happen.  It's just not possible.  Even when you're feeling sad or lost inside, you can still exhibit an outward appearance of positivity.  In fact, I would say that when you feel it the least is when you need it the most.  Trying to keep a positive attitude when things are really hard does not in any way diminish the situation but it DOES give you strength to get through the hard times.


I have come so far since that day in the elevator all those years ago.  Sometimes, it just amazes how much I'm affected by people and things around me.  I often wonder if I ever do that to others.  If I do, great, but even if  I don't, I'm a much better person for letting my life lessons influence me.  You should try it.


(FYI - positive thinking is only PART of the secret to being happy.  To be continued...)